Monday, August 22, 2011

How to Fix a Relationship

Every relationship has its ups and downs, its rough periods. Even in the best of circumstances, there are difficult times. It's natural so don't beat yourself up if you're relationship doesn't seem like a Hollywood romance. The fact is that people change, circumstances change, emotions change...everything changes!

Over time, the natural ebb and flow of everyday life places incredible pressure on a relationship.

Almost unnoticed at first, you begin to think thoughts that had once been unthinkable. "I love him, but I'm not in love with him. Not anymore." "I'm not attracted to her, not like I was in the beginning." "Maybe if we separated for awhile..." The skies can darken in a hurry, and this can be a very scary time. Suddenly, the security of the relationship (one of the major advantages of long-term commitment) has vanished, and we're left with circular questions and a growing field of doubt.

Take heart, if you're in the midst of one of these dark times, then there is hope. Our thoughts and beliefs determine how we define our relationships, and the sunrise may be only a small shift away. If you and your partner survive these darkest of times, you may find your couple emerges with a stronger, more trusting relationship than you ever imagined possible. You've entered the next level of intimacy and commitment. The following tips may help you make it to your goal:

Clarify your expectations. Couples rarely take time to discuss how to handle the little things in life. What does romance mean to each of you? How will the finances be managed? How will you raise your children? What about religion? How do you feel and understand love? What hurts you? How will arguments be resolved? How will decisions be made? What do you need from your spouse, what does your spouse need from you? As tedious as it might sound, most of us probably never even verbalize these things for ourselves, much less our partners. So we go through our relationships, blindly feeling for the right way to love our significant other. After you take the time to answer these questions honestly, you'll have the beginnings of a map which, in time, will lead to a deeper intimacy, a more loving relationship, and better sex.

Fight fairly. Life and love are complex, and disagreements will come your way. Deal with them as they come, slowly rather than quickly. Leave the past in the past, and handle the current disagreement on its own. Do NOT bring up the hurts and disappointments from the history of your relationship. Those are different matters, and if they still needs to be resolved, it's best to bring them up on their own, not in the midst of a separate argument. Stay focused on the current issue and keep the personal attacks to yourself. Also, a top tip of relationship experts. If you're arguing, it's more likely that the discussion will be civil and calm if you're close to one another and can reach out to make contact every so often. Studies show that physical touch will help keep the temperature down and your relationship intact.

Face the problems that you have. Avoiding, neglecting, and hiding from reality will change nothing. In fact, it will often complicate the problem. If you're having problems with your finances, admit it, bring it out in the open. Once it's on the table, it will be much less disturbing, and more tangible so that you may better deal with it.

Honesty still is the best policy. Looking at yourself is probably the hardest part of the process because it's so easy to blame some external entity for our problems. Take a good look in the mirror. If your behavior-how you communicate, treat your spouse, or self-destructive tendencies-is undermining your relationship, taking responsibility for it is the first step to moving forward and rejuvenating your couple.

Be proactive. If you're waiting for your partner to take action before you begin, chances are you'll be waiting for a long time, and all the while, you're relationship will only spoil further. Take the initiative. Set the example and change your behaviors. Soon enough, your partner's behaviors will change in response.

Get to work rebuilding compatibility. Time unveils the differences between couples, especially when your relationship is in jeopardy. I know it can be tough when things look so grim, but seek out the common interests. Look for the good things, and, with enough time, they are sure to multiply. Back in the height of your relationship, what did you and your partner enjoy doing together? Going to the beach, the movies? Walking together at sunset? Playing board games?

It's always a great exercise to take a stroll down memory lane. Think back to the first moments of your relationship. What was it that first attracted you to your partner? What made you fall in love with him or her? Think back to these moments and get inside of them. See what you saw, hear what you heard, and feel what you felt. It's possible to rekindle those feelings, to bring them into your troubled relationship.

Laugher is the best medicine for most serious situations so it's important that you keep your sense of humor. Your relationship is in trouble. Being angry and brooding will only make things worse. Laugh out loud as if you were a kid, unconcerned and confident. Things can get better and the more optimistic you are, the better.

Take a deep breath. I know that things look grim now, but trust that this is a natural part of the relationship cycle. Your couple can make it through this moment of upheaval and emerge on the other side, a stronger, more confident partnership.

Dennis is a happily married man, with years of experience in relationships and interpersonal communications. To find out more check out this site: http://www.howtofixabrokenrelationship.info/

How To Get Your Husband To Love You Again: 3 Easy Steps Worth Taking

Are you wondering about how to get your husband to love you again? Perhaps you noticed him being different lately? Does he avoid meeting your gaze? Does it seem like there is no more connection between the two of you that every talking point you initiate end up being futile in the long run? Well, read this article and take advantage of the various tips and tricks that may be shared with you as far as making your husband love you once again is concerned.

1. Re-Ignite The Spark: Do Things You Used To Do Together

First and foremost, spend time to think about something that can bring a new meaning to the relationship. Make sure it is something that your husband will extremely like so that it will be guaranteed to ignite a spark in your marriage. This will surely be a good start of bringing back the romance that has lost its glow for quite a while now.

There are actually a lot of ways to do it and one of which is by doing the things he used to love doing with you. This will somehow bring back not just the happy memories you shared in the past but of course, the old feelings which eventually might just be the trick you need to rekindle his love and affection for you. Watch the last full show in your favorite movie house. Go to that one place where you both fell in love with the band performing, the cocktails and the ambience.

2. Initiate Communication: Do Not Tire Of Reaching Out

Another way of how to get your husband to love you again is to initiate communication in the relationship. This is actually the most indispensable ingredient of a healthy and successful marriage. Without it, you can be certain that the marriage is doomed to fail. But then, take note as well that communication is not all about talking to one another. You should also know what your husband feels or needs or how he thinks about a particular issue or concern. In that way, your relationship will not turn out a guessing game for both of you in the end.

3. Learn The Art Of Listening

You see, listening to your partner is also another way of knowing how to get your husband to love you again and you can be certain that it can truly help you make the relationship work. Oftentimes, the wife becomes too engrossed with her work or perhaps too busy with the children that she tends to neglect listening to the needs of her husband which becomes one of the reasons why eventually the marriage gets sour. So in order to avoid complications or misunderstandings in your marriage, make it a point that you attend to the needs of your husband before anything else. In that way, he will not feel that you are neglecting him.

In a nutshell, finding out about how to get your husband to love you again is not a difficult job after all. For as long as there is love, everything will surely come out naturally. Do not wait for your husband to file a divorce case against you before you will do something to work things out. After all; there may always be another woman lurking in the dark waiting for your husband to be free.

What If, no matter what your love life is like now - even if there's no man at all, or the man you have is pulling away and you feel alone, scared and angry - you could change everything, practically overnight?

You can! And all it will take is a few simple shifts in your words and body language to connect to a man where it counts... through his heart.

Learn the secrets from my friend: Rori Raye - a relationship coach, author, speaker and seminar leader. She teaches women simple and effective techniques for communication, confidence, and connecting with men that she used to turn her own miserable, empty love life into the glorious, two-decades-long marriage she has now. Visit her site at http://roriraye.org/

A Golden Age Love Story

With a golden age about her, you would never know. She was so busy with her shovel and her trowel as I came upon her quietly working alone. She was making narrow walkways through her garden, placing bricks in neat, tidy borders, her day-dreaming drifting among the thorns and rose buds.

Planting, feeding - sowing, weeding, her flowers brighten everyone with her love in the sunshine of the hot, dry, dog-days of summer. Her pathways leading her where they may... a golden age offers choices that are hers alone.

A squirrel scampers down the trunk of the tree, curious, watching me gather blossoms for my table and a few for my friend needing to be remembered with happiness and beauty. She is startled by a garter-snake basking in the sun; it's surprised by her presence too, slithering away, it isn't anymore.

A pathway gently winds around her house, windows sparkling in the sunshine, the rays of which enter my heart. My love for her all these years beckons my constant return, much to my surprise.

There have been times I have come to her, lost and afraid, searching for the smile in her warm brown eyes, tears clouding mine. She is cherished as a precious gem, a glitter of delight as she offers comfort and concern with patience, understanding and fresh sweet rolls baked at dawn.

She has never met a stranger, everyone is her friend; she wants nothing more than goodness for everyone. There is wisdom in her knowing, her kindness never dims as she offers me direction, teaching me so much of life, about myself, about being a wife, a mother, a grandmother, a friend.

Her years are many and her temples turning gray, but her eyes still shine and sparkle - her calloused hands are strong, soft and gentle. In the fading sunlight, tiredness caresses her sun-browned face - each hour so precious because I don't know when she may be leaving. Until then, my love is with her all the more, my dear, gentle long-time friend, my mother-in-law.

And I watch him, who is always so giving but not always so quiet - giving his advice, he never seems wrong. His convictions, for sure, not generally mine, but usually somewhere close, slightly edging over my line.

Taking up his orange broom-handle walking stick, he gathers his dogs about him and steps through the gate with them scampering playfully about his slippered feet. He's never cross or angry, and you feel as though his wisdom could move mountains from the pathways before you.

I smile at his judgments, his criticisms, too much on some issues. At times I find myself questioning, "is his vision that much farther than mine?" He's always there as a loving reminder of what we have all meant to him, quick to tell us of his love as he hugs away our insecurities and fears.

As a grandpa he is wonderful, the sunshine in their tears. As a father, not always agreed with but the twinkle of mischief seldom missed as their eyes meet in mutual respect.

He has offered me solace, a smile, a hug when we've met; he calls me his daughter and I know that I am. A golden age has passed too quickly - I love him and honor him, this gentle, giving man, a life-long friend, my father-in-law.

Their fifty years of marriage, a life-time of many golden hours of happiness, occasionally over-shadowed by great sorrows, births and deaths, times of plenty and want, a whole lot of love taking them through the golden age.

They have provided a direct loving path for our family through our celebrations spent building traditions, offering lessons of learning, growing, sharing their love, friendship, kinship, and honor.

I salute your courage, your faith, the wisdom and love you give to one another, to each of us always. God bless you and keep you in His light and love forevermore.

A golden age this ~ your Golden Wedding Anniversary.

Darlene is an expert in relationships - why they do or don't work and usually has a tip or two for making them work better...how you play the 'relationship game' is what often allows you to win the prize - a happier life and a lot of friends. More articles on Everything Relationships can be found at http://www.darlenepeltz.com/

Does He LOVE Me? 2 Weird Ways the Universe Wants to Tell You He Does! (No Bull)

Does he really love me? How can I be sure? And what are the signs he's the one? How can I tell that he's the one I'm going to spend a lifetime with... for better or for worse? With so many scandals in the news these days... it's no wonder there is a complete and utter panic in so many relationships... especially when it to is cheating, fidelity and the idea that each of us has a "soulmate" we were destined to meet.

Did you know that some studies show that over 75% of women believe in soul-mates or spiritual partnerships?

Strangely... only about 40% of men do!

And if you can't even trust that he loves you, how can you possible know for sure he won't stray, cheat or "trade up" when someone better or more interesting comes along?

The good news?

You CAN! And if you know what to look for....the signs that your man is "true" are FAR easier to see than you realize.

As an emotional intuitive, I not only believe that we are each born with a spiritual partner and special soulmate we are destined to be with, I also believe that the signs of TRUE love are there from the beginning... AND are obvious in ways that unfortunately most women miss!

Want to know what those 2 primary things are?

They may seem "out there" or new age, or silly to some, but if you believe in PASSION and purpose, and the idea that there is a PLAN to our lives, understanding these 3 signs is critical to meeting (and marrying) the man of your dreams.

1 - The Amore of Aura

Every good emotional empath, or love psychic/intuitive will tell you that TRUE love, has an emotional energy that can be read. Scientists now call this "subtle energy" and they use it to study healing, hope and happiness. Psychics call this an AURA, and it's actually visible to a sensitive from miles away... simply through the sound of your voice. (and every emotion has a corresponding color aura - from the darkness of depression to the fire red of PASSION to the deep blue of everlasting love)

2 - The Karma of Connection

Have a series of strange things conspired to bring you together? Did you meet in an unlikely way? Did everything that HAD to go right fall into place for you to be together? I believe that the universe conspires to bring people who are meant to be together into the RIGHT circumstances to make that happen and there is NO better sign than he is your soulmate and true spiritual partner, than when you understand that there are forces FAR greater than you that want this relationship to work!

At the end of the day, in my 20 years of researching "psychic connections" between couples - people who believe in fate, karma and intuition are FAR more likely to find their soul-mates, and true happiness than those that don't!

Want PROOF? Click HERE ===> to Find Out if He REALLY Loves You....... Without Having to Have Your Heart Broken EVER again!

(The Psychic Secret to EVERLASTING Love)

How To Make Him Love Me: Your 3-Step Approach To Get The Love You Want

So you ask yourself the questions every other woman on earth asks - that of "how to make him love me" but then you just cannot seem to find the answers that can help you. Really, having a partner is not as simple as it may seem. Too many times, hearts get broken, relationships fail; people go.

For these, it becomes essential to find the most efficient ways by which you will know how to make your partner love you with the kind of love that lasts. But then again, keep in mind that finding the ultimate solutions to your problem of "how to make him love me" is not an easy task to pull off. That is why make sure you pin down the tips that could be truly useful for you, make it a point that you implement them right away. Below are some helpful tips you may find useful as far as improving your relationship with your partner is concerned. That way, you can have the man you love chasing you like crazy anywhere you go.

Tip #1:

Set Up A Romantic Dinner With Your Husband

Make sure to set up a romantic dinner with your spouse. This has been an old technique used by women to make husbands feel special. Although it may be an old approach you can use to address your concern about "how to make him love me", you will be surprised at how such old strategy can work so well.

Tip #2:

Do Something Special For The Man You Love

Do the things he loves. Cook for him. Treat him to a nice restaurant where they serve his most favorite cuisines. Bring him to the massage parlor and let him relax while he gets his body massage. Or perhaps you can ask him to go with you and go to spa.

But then, take note that it is not only by spending a lot of money can you successfully do something special for your man. Watching a movie with him or perhaps simply lying down together, cuddling with each other as you both read each of your books is more than enough to make your husband feel special already.

Tip #3:

Be Friends With His Friends

Go out together with his friends. Some women do not like the idea of going out with the husband along with his friends. But then, you have no idea how doing it can bring excitement and happiness to your man's heart.

But then if you are not really sold to the idea of going out with them just so you can address your concern over your question ""how to make him love me"; especially that it matters to you that you are the only member of the female population joining them), then what you can do instead is set up a dinner and cocktail party in your home and invite all his friends over. That should be the final trick you need to make your man love you even more. Take heed of all these three tips and you will be surprised how you will not need to ask the same question you have asked yourself for many years now - that of "how to make him love me".

What If, no matter what your love life is like now - even if there's no man at all, or the man you have is pulling away and you feel alone, scared and angry - you could change everything, practically overnight?

You can! And all it will take is a few simple shifts in your words and body language to connect to a man where it counts... through his heart.

Discover the secret from my friend: Rori Raye: How to fix your relationship practically overnight - no matter how afraid of intimacy you are or he is, or what the relationship is like right now. Visit her site now at http://roriraye.net/

Unique Wedding Dresses for Brides Who Love Frills

Nothing compares to a royal wedding when it comes to ratings. An estimated two billion people watched Prince William and Kate Middleton tie the knot on April 29th, 2011. If that number is accurate, that means that nearly one in every three people witnessed the royal wedding, either in person or on television. How does someone handle that kind of pressure...billions of eyes on them? Answer: She wears a killer dress.

Miss Middleton walked down the aisle in a stunning designer gown that cost around 40,000 dollars.

The dress was handmade by a top couturier, and it had all the bells and whistles. Lace applique, a nine foot train, and a shimmering silk ivory-tulle veil were only the appetizers. The world's most talked about gown was made from English Cluny lace and French Chantilly lace throughout the bodice and the underskirt. The actual skirt was composed of white satin gazar and was designed to resemble an opening flower. It will be put on public display this summer at Buckingham Place.

Few girls can afford to wear a dress like Kate's on their wedding day. After all, they don't have a budget of twenty million pounds. The average bride-to-be spends about a thousand dollars on her bridal gown. But costs are on the rise as more and more brides are requesting the little extras.

The term "no-frills" was first used to describe a dress that was rather plain. These gowns lacked ruffles, flounces and frills, of course. They were popular with brides of all social stations. Believe it or not, most wealthy women did not wear fancy or elaborate wedding gowns until fairly recently. Even royal brides wore dresses they had worn before.

The now traditional white wedding was created in 1840, when Queen Victoria married Prince Albert in an elaborate white wedding gown. The bridal industry has never been the same.

Most modern brides-to-be want the fairy tale. They want to walk down the aisle in a dress that has all the frills and furbelows it can carry.

The Little Extras

Men sometimes wonder why women want, even demand, unnecessary accessories. This goes double on the wedding day, when all these little extras really do add up. A simple, unadorned wedding gown can be purchased for only a few hundred dollars. But a designer dress with lace, ruffles and frills can go for thousands of dollars. So why do women want them?

Even though they can cost an arm and a leg, a gown with all the little extras screams femininity. When they are properly applied, these "unnecessary" accessories add elegance to an otherwise plain dress.

They can also be used to balance out or conceal problem areas for larger brides.

Accessories by Body Type

Frills and flounces are all over the catwalks lately. The bridal industry is booming and most of the top designers make wedding dresses. Of course, most modern brides don't fit into column dresses that were made for models. They have curves and they require dresses that flatter their slightly larger figures. Ruffles and frills are often used on these gowns.

Millions of American women carry extra weight in their hips, thighs, and backsides. When fitted for a formal gown, they are often described as pear shaped. The problem these women have is that most dresses do flatter their figures. They often appear bottom heavy in wedding photographs. Adding volume is really the only way to balance out problem areas and the easiest and most affordable way to do that is with ruffles.

A few ruffles or frills on the top half of a dress for a pear-shaped woman can create the illusion of balance. The only danger is overdoing it. One too many ruffles can and probably will make your dress look too complicated.

A Few Helpful Hints

Ruffles and frills work best on plain dresses.

An already ornate gown will look overdone if anything is added to it. When ruffles are added because of body type, the rest of the dress should be simple and clean. This includes other bridal accessories like the veil, the train and the shoes. Too much makeup, jewelry and a complicated coiffure can also detract from the dress.

It is always best to keep it simple. A plain gown with a few furbelows can complement almost any figure.

Where to go?

Ruffles and frills are almost always added to wedding dresses; they rarely come that way. Though the project is simple, it is rarely a good idea to do it on your own. Wedding gowns are expensive, and one misplaced stitch could end up costing a fortune. Experienced seamstresses are kept on staff at most bridal salons, boutiques and warehouses. They can handle all of your alteration needs.

Ruffles, frills, and flounces can be added to nearly any wedding gown by a professional seamstress. Find your favorite designs, replete with all the frills you desire now online.

Scott Payne is a freelance writer who writes about weddings and specific products such as wedding dresses.

What Makes Men Fall in Love?

After researching this subject "What Makes Men Fall In Love" I have come to the conclusion that men are just as complicated as women. And that most of the things that we do to attract someone of the opposite sex is just natural. If I had to sit down and plan how I was going to act to attract a man then I would probably give up. I mean, if it's something that you need to "act" to do, then eventually the act will disappear and he will be left with the natural you. Fortunately for us "what makes men fall in love" will come natural, especially when you run across a man that triggers your pheromones ( in Greek known as the "excitement carrier") and hopefully you will trigger his.

But there are some interesting data I found on this topic on "What Makes Men Fall In Love?" that I know you will find interesting. So keep on reading, I think you will be surprised to realize that a lot of these things are things that you do naturally.

First of all I discovered that men get butterflies in their stomach too! I would have never guessed! And that they really do desire to find someone to fall in love with. That it's not just all about sex. They have that nesting urge in them as much as women do, to just find that one mate to make a home with and to have children with.

So what attributes do women have that makes a man fall in love? From what I have discovered, men have four basic needs, and if he finds these qualities in you then his desire to be with you increase. I have included them below.

The Need To Protect.

Yes, men are wired to nurture. Nurturing and sheltering you from harm makes him feel like a Man. So, letting him see your vulnerable side will bring him closer to you, it will bring out that instinct to take care of you. So let him take charge on occasion, and be sure to thank him when he does. Here is a list of things that will bring out his superman, and make him feel good.

1. Give him a job to do or ask him for help with something, create opportunities for him to feel needed. And whatever you do don't control the situation, just sit back and let him be the superman.

2. Ask his opinion on so meting and listen. It makes him feel like you value his opinion and his brain.

3. Dress feminine. OK, you don't have to do this all the time, but on occasional it won't hurt. If you like to wear jeans then make sure your underclothing is sexy. Men love soft sexy clothes, they accentuate your feminine nature which ignites his amorous nature. But also on occasion wear his clothes, his shirt at night over you naked body is a real turn-on. His jacket when you get cold. These make him feel like you have chosen him over other guys.

The Need For Freedom

Men need to know that their male identity will still be there when they become attached to a woman. So, it's important that you let him know that you don't expect him to change, that you are not out to fix him. He needs to feel that you understand him and that his identity is safe. Here is a list of other things you can show him to make him feel safe.

1. Turn him down on occasion. It will make him feel more at ease knowing that your life isn't tied around him, that you have your own identity. It will also make him curious, and therefore pursue you more.

2. Share your own fears about commitment, it will make him feel more at ease and that your not out to get him. It will also open up some communication about how you both feel.

3. Change your appearance when you feel like it. Don't ask for his permission or approval. If you want to color your hair or wear a different shade of lipstick, then go for it. This lets him know that there is more then one side to you, which can be exciting.

4. Respect his space. Don't bug him about where he has been or what he does all day. Don't just show up at his door, rummage through his drawers or always checking his cell phone. Allow him his own space. His space is a symbol of independence, so respect it.

5. Appreciate him. Make sure to let him know that you notice the small things he does.

The Need To Shine

Yes, men can be just as insecure as women, even if they don't act it. And they need to know you respect and appreciate them, but they if you can make them feel better about who they are, well that's just a big plus, especially around others. So here are some tips to help you do that.

1. Make him laugh. Tease him about the little stupid things he does, or during the little ha ha moments, like when he falls out of bed during sex. Just try to keep things light and he will treasure you.

2. Be social and drag him along. Most men don't have a lot of social graces, so take the lead and be the social butterfly. He will appreciate you for it, in fact, he might take credit for it.

3. Be intellectual with him, take politics, play scrabble, chess. Men love the mental stimulation, and from his lady is twice as good.

4. Act like the grand prize when you are out with him, it will make him feel very manly.

The Need To Feel Comfort

Did you know there is a chemical (oxytocin) that floods the brain that helps develop attachment, or falling in love? And you know what else, you can help to release these chemicals by making him feel like the two of you fit together, that you are comfortable together. So here are some tips that will make him feel comfortable.

1. Let him see you bath, shower, or groom yourself. This will enhance intimacy, something that nobody else has privy to, just him. Make sure you don't do any of the gross stuff, like bleaching your mustache.

2. Cook together. We all know that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, but food also spikes the oxytocin levels in him, these chemicals creates good feelings, which he will associate with you.

3. When grocery shopping, buy a few things that he likes, this will make him feel more at home when he comes over.

4. Take little cat naps next to him, or doze off in his arms, he will see you at your most vulnerable and trusting, and make him feel more protective of you.

So, that is what my research has taught me on "What Makes Men Fall in Love?" Basically it all comes down to chemicals and you being a woman and him being a man. But it doesn't hurt to know what makes us tick. Lord knows I could use all the help I can get on trying to figure out what makes men fall in love.

Now I know what to do and I hope you have a better clue. If you need more information on "What Makes Men Fall in Love?" You can find more information on Love and Relationships by going Here

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